this is important and informative and amazing

A Radical TransFeminist

This is just a quick piece I wanted to write about how I think there’s a set of seemingly counter-intuitive things some trauma survivors do, based on avoiding or even actively disrupting their own friendships and other support networks. I’m primarily writing for people who want to know how to support a survivor, but I hope the piece will also be useful for survivors themselves.

The subject came up during some recent conversations with friends; originally I just wanted to post a link to existing articles, but I wasn’t able to find anything. Instead, I’m trying to patch something together from the various areas of experience I have. I’ve sometimes needed support and noticed myself being avoidant in minor ways, and I’ve sometimes been in the position of offering support to friends who are either in a relationship with an abuser or who have survived abuse.

However I don’t write…

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Photo on 2012-10-10 at 20.38

bad ass mother fucker

Yeah I got a Twin Peaks tattoo
I am so happy it looks so awesome I especially like that it looks like its been carved in which is extra cool in the context of the show OK
it hurt like a bitch ok but my friend held my hand and talked me through it the whole time and it was a lot of fun and I am a very happy lady

That god forbid that made me first your slave, 
I should in thought control your times of pleasure,
Or at your hand the account of hours to crave, 
Being your vassal, bound to stay your leisure! 
O, let me suffer, being at your beck, 
The imprison’d absence of your liberty;
And patience, tame to sufferance, bide each cheque,
Without accusing you of injury. 
Be where you list, your charter is so strong
That you yourself may privilege your time 
To what you will; to you it doth belong 
Yourself to pardon of self-doing crime. 
   I am to wait, though waiting so be hell;
   Not blame your pleasure, be it ill or well.